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Microsloshed Walls
Microsloshed Corporation of Smoke'em, Washington introduces the most
fantabulous operating system overlay ever, a high-performance GUI
(Generally Useless Interface) that will transform your measly old
command-line driven PC into a state-of-the-art multitasking system! o
Microsloshed Walls frees you from the worries of incompatible hardware--in
fact, if any part of your computer is in the tiniest respect different
from an original IBM PC, Microsloshed Walls will pretend it doesn't exist
and lock up when you try to install the drivers--automatically!
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Complicated and cumbersome command-line
functions have been replaced by simple, intuitive mouse-driven commands
without confusing options or user-burdening functionality.
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Microsloshed Walls version 3.0 is a major
step forward--boldly abandoning the restraints of compatibility with
either DOS or Walls 2.9 applications while not making you waste your
time learning new features or capabilities.
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Conventional DOS programs are limited to a
mere 640K of memory; Microsloshed Walls will use up every last byte of
memory on your computer and more!
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Microsloshed Walls provides your programs
with a uniform user interface so simple and easy to use that all your
applications will look and act exactly the same. Whether you're using a
telecommunications package or a compiler, you'll be completely unable to
tell them apart!
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Several of the functions of the
Microsloshed applications you've grown to love under DOS will still work
some of the time under Walls and a variety of Microsloshed products are
very nearly supported by Microsloshed Walls including Expell, QuirkC,
QuirkBASIC, QuirkPascal, and QuirkRATFOR.
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The popular word processing program
Microsloshed Wart has been fully updated and modified just for Walls,
making it totally unlike Microsloshed Wart while still retaining the
same name.
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Microsloshed Walls includes its own special
version of QEMMMM (Quirky Extraneous Massive Memory Multi-Mangler)
converting your system's extraneous memory into impacted memory which
can be more efficiently wasted by Walls.
We guarantee that, when you install Microsloshed Walls on your
computer, you'll kiss your old DOS prompt goodbye. In fact, after just one
session with Microsloshed Walls, you may never use any of your old
programs again.
Microsloshed. Software that makes your computer obsolete.
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The Unnatural Enquirer, (C) 1990 by Trygve Lode (tlode@nyx.cs.du.edu) May
be reproduced and distributed freely in unmodified form on a noncommercial
basis provided this notice remains intact. Reprinted with permission.
 
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